Yosef's Treatment of his Family/2

Yosef's Treatment of his Family

Exegetical Approaches

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Yosef Concerned over his Brothers

Testing his Brothers

Yosef set up an elaborate plan to assess whether his brothers had changed over the years and regretted their original misdeeds.

Sources:Jubilees4243:1-30About Jubilees, PhiloOn Joseph XXXIXAbout Philo, JosephusAntiquities of the Jews 2:6:2Antiquities of the Jews 2:6:4Antiquities of the Jews 2:6:7Antiquities of the Jews 2:6:8Antiquities of the Jews 2:6:9About Josephus, R. Shemuel b. Chofni GaonBereshit 41:51Bereshit 42:7Bereshit 42:9-13, 15Bereshit 44:1Bereshit 44:2Bereshit 44:8Bereshit 45:3About R. Shemuel b. Chofni Gaon, Ramban #2Bereshit 42:9 (Israel)Bereshit 44:1Bereshit 45:1About R. Moshe b. Nachman,¹ R. Yonah #3Derashot R. Yonah Parashat Vayigash,² Sefer HaYashar53:16-23About Sefer HaYashar, Ralbag, Akeidat Yitzchak2930, Questions 2-430About R. Yitzchak Arama, Abarbanel #2Bereshit 41Bereshit 41-42, questions 4,6Bereshit 42:7Bereshit 42:25Bereshit 43:33About R. Yitzchak Abarbanel,³ SefornoBereshit 42:9Bereshit 43:16Bereshit 43:34Bereshit 44:1-2Bereshit 44:16About R. Ovadyah Seforno, Or HaChayyimBereshit 42:9Bereshit 44:1-2About R. Chayyim b. Atar,⁴ BiurBereshit 41:51Bereshit 44:2About the Biur (Netivot HaShalom), R. Hirsch

Purpose of the Test

• Concern over Binyamin – Ralbag asserts that Yosef was assessing the brother's attitude towards Binyamin, thinking that if he were being treated negatively, he would save Binyamin from their hands.
• Concern for self – According to R. Yonah, Akeidat Yitzchak, and Abarbanel, in contrast, Yosef was not sure if he himself was still in danger from his brother's hatred.  Before revealing himself, he wanted ascertain their feelings.  R. Yonah asserts that Yosef would then act in accord with his findings - either to forgive them or to exact revenge.⁵
• Test original motive – Josephus suggests that seeing how the brothers treated Binyamin would prove whether their original actions had been motivated by malice and wickedness, or if, instead, all had just been guided by Hashem's hand.

Why did Yosef not contact Yaakov immediately?

• Atonement for own sins – R. Yonah posits that Yosef might have seen his exile as atonement for his own misdeeds in slandering his brothers.
• To spare Yaakov – Alternatively, Yosef feared that alerting Yaakov to the sale and his sons' behavior would have caused him more distress than his inability to reunite with Yosef.⁶
• Multiple stages – Akeidat Yitzchak suggests that at first Yosef did not reveal his whereabouts, knowing that his father would not have enough money to redeem his regardless.  After he was promoted, he hesitated knowing that his status was not yet solidified⁷ and that the revelation could endanger it.⁸ In addition, the overseeing and collecting of grain kept him so busy that had no opportunities to send to his father.

"כִּי נַשַּׁנִי אֱלֹהִים אֶת כָּל עֲמָלִי וְאֵת כָּל בֵּית אָבִי"

• Wrongs forgotten– R. Shemuel b. Chofni explains that with Yosef's change of fortune and the birth of his son, the pain of his brothers' mistreatment subsided. Thus, when the brothers arrived, he was no longer filled with anger or vengeful thoughts.
• Intentional "forgetting" – R"Y Arama suggests, instead, that the name hints to the fact that the time had not yet come for him to remember and send to his father. Yosef intentionally "forgot" his father's house. R. Arama posits that Yosef, nonetheless, recognized that there was a sinful side to this decision.⁹
• Forgotten but not forgetting – In contrast to the above, Abarbanel claims that the name proves that Yosef did not forget his father's house.  Despite his rise to power and economic dealings, on a day of happiness Yosef thought of and longed for his family.¹⁰  In naming his son, Yosef was blessing Hashem for both the good, that his servitude is behind him, and the bad, that he was forgotten by his family.

Remembering the dreams

• R"Y Aramaa and Abarbanel assert that seeing the dreams begin to actualize made Yosef curious as to whether they would be fulfilled completely, leading him to ask about his father and brother.¹¹
• According to R. Shemuel b. Chofni, in contrast, memory of the dreams did not prompt Yosef into any specific action. The verse is simply saying that when Yosef saw his dreams begin to be fulfilled he remembered them.¹²

Accusation of espionage

• According to Philo, R. Shemuel b. Chofni and Akeidat Yitzchak, this was simply a means to an end. Using this method, Yosef could ensure that the brothers brought Binyamin to Egypt¹³ so that he could then test how they treated him and whether they had changed their ways.¹⁴
• Ralbag suggests that the accusation allowed Yosef an initial probe into the goings-on in the family, allowing him to find out whether his brother and father were still alive.¹⁵

Initial returning of their payment – R. Shemuel b. Chofni suggests that this was not part of the test. Rather, Yosef simply wanted to save his family money.¹⁶  Alternatively, one could propose that Yosef, thinking that the original sale was partially motivated by financial gain, was testing whether the brothers would pocket the returned payments or not.

Favoring Binyamin

• Test jealousy – Philo and Seforno assert that Yosef wanted to see if the brothers would be envious of Binyamin. To know whether the brothers had really changed, it was necessary to put them in a similar situation to the one that had caused them to sell Yosef years before. Thus, Yosef loads Binyamin with presents, much as Yaakov had favored Yosef, and then monitors the brothers' reaction.
• Show of mercy – Ralbag, in contrast, asserts that Yosef wanted to show the brothers that he cared for Binyamin so that when he was accused, the brother's would remember that Yosef had a merciful side and think there was a chance they could successfully plea for him, rather than take some drastic measures thinking there was no hope.

Second returning of payment

• Test – R. Shemuel b. Chofni and Abarbanel view this as part of the test Yosef set up for the brothers. Abarbanel proposes that Yosef was preventing a potential flaw in his plan – that the brothers would erroneously conclude that Binyamin had actually stolen the goblet and from a sense of justice (rather than spite or hatred) allow him to be punished. He, therefore, planted not just the goblet but also all of their monies, to ensure that the brothers recognized that this was a set-up.¹⁷
• Good will – Ramban and Seforno, suggest, as above, that Yosef returned the money out of good will. Moreover, he does so with the brothers' knowledge,¹⁸ to compensate them for the troubles he had put them through when he had accused them of spying.¹⁹

Framing an innocent person?

• Sefer HaYashar and the Biur assert that Yosef had actually revealed himself and his entire scheme to Binyamin earlier, so Binyamin did not suffer from any anxiety or the like.
• Others focus on the problematic slandering of Binyamin's character. Perhaps this, in part, motivates Abarbanel to suggest that Yosef made certain that the brothers knew Binyamin was framed (see above). R. Shemuel b. Chofni Gaon, in contrast, asserts simply that the ends (the reuniting of the family and assuaging of Yaakov's longing) justified the means (the temporary slandering.)

"הָאֱלֹהִים מָצָא אֶת עֲוֹן עֲבָדֶיךָ" – Seforno understands that the brothers are saying that though they are innocent of this charge, Hashem is repaying them for a different sin, the selling of Yosef. If so, this is exactly what Yosef was trying to determine, whether the brothers regretted their original actions or not.

Portrait of Yosef – This position views Yosef as trying to move beyond the pain he endured at the hands of his brothers and being nobly concerned with the welfare of his family.

Facilitating his Brothers' Repentance

Yosef inflicted suffering on his brothers in order to help them attain penance for their crimes.

Sources:Seikhel TovBereshit 37:36Bereshit 41:51Bereshit 45:1About R. Menachem b. Shelomo, R. Avraham SabaTzeror HaMor Bereshit 41:51Tzeror HaMor Bereshit 42Tzeror HaMor Bereshit 44About R. Avraham Saba (Tzeror HaMor), Abarbanel #1Bereshit 41Bereshit 41-42, questions 4,6Bereshit 42:7Bereshit 42:25Bereshit 43:33About R. Yitzchak Abarbanel,²⁰ R. Eliezer AshkenaziMa'asei Hashem Ma'asei Avot 38About R. Eliezer Ashkenazi (Ma'asei Hashem), Keli YekarBereshit 42:7Bereshit 42:14Bereshit 42:16About R. Shelomo Ephraim Lunshitz, Or HaChayyim #1Bereshit 42:9Bereshit 44:1-2About R. Chayyim b. Atar²¹

Measure for measure – Abarbanel and others in his wake²² note that the uncomfortable situations in which Yosef placed his brothers correlate to the experiences which they caused him to endure.  Yosef wanted them to be punished in this world, to spare them a worse punishment later.

Why did Yosef not contact Yaakov immediately? According to the Keli Yekar, Yosef felt that if Hashem had not revealed his whereabouts to Yaakov, it must be because He wanted Yaakov to suffer. Yaakov deserved punishment for having himself been away from his father for twenty-two years, and thus needed to be punished by not seeing Yosef for the same length of time.

"כִּי נַשַּׁנִי אֱלֹהִים אֶת כָּל עֲמָלִי וְאֵת כָּל בֵּית אָבִי" – According to this approach these words of Yosef do not reflect a detachment from his family.  Rather, as Seikhel Tov and the Tzeror HaMor explain, Yosef is merely stating that, with his rise to power, he has forgotten the hardships his family had caused him to endure.  Thus, he had no desires for revenge, but only to help the brothers.

Remembering the dreams and accusation of espionage – Abarbanel and the Keli Yakar maintain that the brothers sinned in suspecting Yosef of tattle-bearing²³ and for not accepting the truth of his dreams; thus Yosef slandered them as spies.

Imprisonment of Brothers / Shimon – This was to punish the brothers for throwing him into the pit.²⁴

Bringing Binyamin – Abarbanel posits that Yosef might have simply wished to see his brother whom he had left so long ago.  Moreover, Binyamin was necessary for the rest of Yosef's plot. [See bullet below about the goal of framing him.]

Returning of payments

• Reveal sincerity – The Ma'asei Hashem asserts that Yosef did this positive deed so that the brothers would later realize that his actions were not motivated by revenge and hatred, but the sincere desire that their sins would be atoned.
• Recognize Hashem's hand – Similarly, Yosef wanted to ensure that the brothers realized that Binyamin was framed so they would recognize that the punishment was from Hashem, and not due to his guilt.²⁵
• Cause anxiety – According to Abarbanel this was part of the brother's punishment.  Yosef wanted to cause the brothers anxiety, but no real harm, just as they had intended him evil but in the end good came out of the deed.
• Practical measure – Abarbanel further suggests that Yosef planted the money to ensure that the brothers were not delayed in returning to Egypt due to insufficient funds.

Favoring Binyamin – This position might suggest that Yosef was simply showing his love for his brother.  As Binyamin had played no part in the sale he did not deserve any punishment.

Framing Binyamin – The plot of hiding the goblet was aimed at getting the brothers to declare themselves slaves, as penance for selling Yosef into slavery.  Tzeror Hamor points out they are similarly accused of theft since they had "stolen" Yosef.²⁶

Framing an innocent person? Since Binyamin alone did not participate in the sale, it is not clear why he deserved to suffer, especially as it would seem that Yosef could have accomplished his goal by framing any of the brothers.  This approach could suggest, as does Sefer HaYashar above, that Yosef actually told Binyamin in advance what he planned to do so that he did not suffer from the accusation.

אֲבָל אֲשֵׁמִים אֲנַחְנוּ עַל אָחִינוּ – Abarbanel claims that Yosef's behavior towards the brothers made them reflect on their past actions and realize that they were deserving of punishment.  Seikhel Tov implies that when Yehuda later tells Yosef, "הָאֱלֹהִים מָצָא אֶת עֲוֹן עֲבָדֶיךָ" this ,too, is an expression of recognition that they were suffering for the sin of selling Yosef as a slave.

Portrait of Yosef – These sources view Yosef as a righteous figure, driven solely by an altruistic desire to help his brothers avoid an even harsher Divine punishment.

Yosef's Hands were Tied

Fulfilling a Prophecy

Under Oath

Yosef's actions must be understood in light of the fact that his brothers had sworn him to secrecy regarding the sale.  His interaction with them in Egypt was aimed at rendering the oath null and void.

Sources:TanchumaMs. Oxford-Bodeli 156About the Tanchuma, R. Yosef Bekhor ShorBereshit 37:26Bereshit 42:7Bereshit 45:15About R. Yosef Bekhor Shor, R. Yehuda HeChasidSefer Chasidim 1961Bereshit 41:51Bereshit 43:7Bereshit 44:21Ms.Parma 251About R. Yehuda HeChasid,²⁷ Daat ZekeinimBereshit 42:1About Daat Zekeinim, Moshav ZekeinimBereshit 45:1About Moshav Zekeinim

Ban (חרם) or oath? These sources differ regarding the nature of the vow taken by Yosef:

• Ban (חרם) – R. Yehuda HeChasid (as brought in Ms Parma 251) and Moshav Zekenim assert that the brothers agreed to a ban on any who would reveal the sale.  Against his will, they included Yosef as the necessary tenth man.²⁸
• Oath – According to R."Y Bekhor Shor and R. Yehuda HeChasid (as brought in his commentary) the brothers swore Yosef to secrecy when he was sold.  Yosef agreed to the condition of silence in order to save his life.²⁹
• Both – Tanchuma Ms, the Sefer Hasidim and Daat Zekenim are slightly ambiguous, but suggest that the brothers made a ban among themselves³⁰ and decreed on Yosef, who was not included therein, that he also not speak of the sale.

Why abide by the Oath? This positions assumes that people took oaths and bans extremely seriously and would not dare to violate them.³¹

Why did Yosef not contact Yaakov immediately? Though Yosef would have liked to contact his father, the brothers had forced Yosef to swear that he would not reveal the sale to his father³² nor return to him.  According to Sefer Chasidim, this last condition was meant to ensure that even if Yosef's dreams came true and he became a ruler, he would at least not rule over the brothers.³³

"כִּי נַשַּׁנִי אֱלֹהִים אֶת כָּל עֲמָלִי וְאֵת כָּל בֵּית אָבִי"

Why not reveal himself to the brothers upon arrival? R"Y Bekhor Shor asserts that Yosef believed that the brothers, in their hatred and shame, would be unwilling to take responsibility for their earlier misdeeds.  If he revealed himself too early, they would simply deny Yosef's existence and remind him that the oath was still in effect. Yosef, thus, made an elaborate plan to force their hands into nullifying the vow.

Accusations of Espionage – This was a means to an end; Yosef wanted to ensure that the brothers brought Binyamin so he could frame him.

Framing Binyamin

• R"Y Bekhor Shor maintains that Yosef pushed the brothers until they were terrified of the possibility that Binyamin would be enslaved and how this would affect their father.  He knew that at that point he could reveal himself for they themselves would be willing to tell Yaakov all in order to save Binyamin.
• According to R. Yehuda HeCHasid, in contrast, Yosef's original plan was to keep Binyamin, forcing his father to come and redeem him.  Yaakov would then see Yosef and recognize him, effectively ending the ban/oath.³⁴

"הוֹצִיאוּ כׇל אִישׁ מֵעָלָי" – R"Y Bekhor Shor and Daat Zekenim point to these words as support for the idea that Yosef was under oath.  Because of his vow, he only revealed himself to the brothers when no one else was present.³⁵

Yehuda's speech and breaking the vow

• Breaking of Vow – According to R. Yehuda HeChasid, Yehuda's words caused Yosef to change his initial plan and break the vow:
• In his commentary, R. Yehuda HeChasid claims that after listening to Yehuda's impassioned plea, Yosef broke down and felt that he could no longer wait for Yaakov to arrive and identify him, and so he broke the vow on his own and revealed himself.³⁶
• In Ms Parma 251, R. Yehuda HeChasid is presented as following the Midrash which claims that Yehuda did not simply plea for his brother but threatened to attack Egypt.³⁷  Yosef was thus left with no choice and concluded that it was better to break the vow than to endanger the entire country.
• No breaking of vow – According to R"Y Bekhor Yehuda's words led Yosef to reveal himself, not just because he recognized the brother's desperation, but also because he realized that his father had suffered too much. Nonetheless, he claims that Yosef still identified himself only privately so as not to break the vow. Only after the brothers reconcile and speak to him, is the oath nullified.³⁸

Reimbursing the money – These sources do not address the issue but could suggest that Yosef wanted to ensure the brothers' speedy return and he thus made sure that they would not be delayed by lack of money.

Favoring Binyamin – This approach could suggest that this was compensation for the anxiety he was soon to endure when accused of theft.  Alternatively, Yosef was simply acting out of his great love for his brother.

Assumed Rejection

Yosef Looked out for Himself

Preserving Egyptian Status

Punishing the Brothers

¹ Ramban made significant changes to his commentary on this passage after arriving in Israel – see Ramban's Updates and particularly Ramban's update to Bereshit 42:9. It is possible that in Israel he was influenced by the question posed by R"Y Bekhor Shor (Bereshit 37:26) of why Yosef did not contact his father, and this caused him to rework his interpretation.  In both the original interpretation and the update, Ramban focuses mainly on the idea that Yosef was trying to fulfill his dreams [see below], but in the update he also adds the element of testing the brothers.

² R. Yonah also raises the possibility that Yosef was partially motivated by a desire to fulfill the dreams or that all the events were orchestrated by Hashem in order to bring Yaakov down to Egypt in honor.

³ See below that Abarbanel also develops the idea that Yosef was motivated by a desire to facilitate the brothers' penance.

⁴ Or HaChayyim combines this with the approach below, that Yosef was trying to help the brothers gain penance.

⁵ R. Hirsch similarly posits that Yosef knew that a physical reconciliation with his brothers would not suffice; only a change of attitude could truly reunite the family. In addition, without knowing where his brothers stood, Yosef himself would not be able to overcome his bitterness and forgive them.

⁶ Both R. Yonah and Akeidat Yitzchak raise this possibility.  Cf. R"Y HeChasid below.

⁷ Only after the famine arrived and Yosef's plan proved successful, would Yosef no longer need to worry about his status.

⁸ He does not elaborate regarding why that would be problematic, but might suggest, as does Abarbanel, that ties to Canaan would have cast doubts on his loyalty to Egypt.

⁹ He claims that this is expressed in Yosef's explanation of his son Efraim's name: " כִּי הִפְרַנִי אֱלֹהִים בְּאֶרֶץ עׇנְיִי"; the word "עׇנְיִי" hints to his "עוון".

¹⁰ Abarbanel might be writing from his own life experiences . He, too, was busy dealing with the finances of government and might have at times felt he had not enough time for his family, but thought of them regardless.

¹¹ According to them this was one of the reasons that Yosef accused his brothers of spying; the accusation would enable him to easily probe his brothers about his father and Binyamin. In contrast to Ramban, however, they do not suggest that the rest of Yosef actions were aimed at actualizing the dreams.

¹² IF so, one might question why this is important for the reader.  It is possible, that the text is simply making sure the reader, too, realizes that Yosef's dreams were not mere fantasies, but held in them future truths.

¹³ R. Shemuel b. Chofni points out that the demand to bring Binyamin obviously had nothing to do with the charge of spying since his presence constituted no proof of their innocence. As such, the whole charge must have been concocted only because Yosef could think of no other way to force the family to bring Binyamin.

¹⁴ According to Philo, since Binyamin was also a son of the beloved Rachel, Yosef was fearful that he too incited hatred and was despised by the brothers. He therefore wanted visual evidence that Binyamin was alive and well.

¹⁵ He assumes that he could not simply ask them personal questions upfront since such questions were normally only asked in connection to marriage negotiations. 

¹⁶ Since he maintains that Yosef harbored no anger at his brothers, he can claim that Yosef was merely looking out for their welfare.

¹⁷ One could disagree with Abarbanel and argue that Yosef actually needed to see how the brothers would act even if their sibling was guilty.  After all, from the brother's perspective, Yosef himself had not been totally innocent when they mistreated him.

¹⁸ Ramban asserts that the openness was necessary for the success of the plan. Otherwise the brothers could claim that they assumed the goblet was given to them as a gift just as their money was returned to them and this was all an innocent mistake.

¹⁹ The advantage of such an approach is that it allows for a more consistent understanding of the action throughout.  If one posits that this is part of the larger test, one would need to explain why there was a need to test the same thing twice, or posit that the same action was designed to test two different things.

²⁰ see above that Abarbanel also suggests that Yosef was testing his brothers.

²¹ Or HaChayyim also brings the approach above that Yosef was testing teh brothers.  According to him the two approaches work together; Yosef tested them as part of the process of their repentance.

²² See Ma'asei Hashem and the Keli Yakar.

²³ It seems unfair to claim that the brother's "suspicions" were sinful, considering that the text testifies to the fact that Yosef did in fact slander the brothers to his father: "וַיָּבֵא יוֹסֵף אֶת דִּבָּתָם רָעָה אֶל אֲבִיהֶם". According to Abarbanel the verse does not refer to Yosef spreading lies or even sharing evil actions that he saw the brothers commit but rather that Yosef told his father what others were saying about the brothers so that his father could rebuke or correct them.  According to the Keli Yakar Yosef was punishing the brothers for their later suspicions, when they assumed that Yosef was checking up on them in Dotan in order to give their father a negative report.  These thoughts, though, are not evident in the text.

²⁴ Prisons in Tanakh are often described as a "בור".  See, for example, Yosef's words, "וְגַם פֹּה לֹא עָשִׂיתִי מְאוּמָה כִּי שָׂמוּ אֹתִי בַּבּוֹר. "

²⁵ This would only explain the second reimbursement.

²⁶ See how Yosef describes his sale to the butler: "כִּי גֻנֹּב גֻּנַּבְתִּי מֵאֶרֶץ הָעִבְרִים".

²⁷ R. Yehuda HeChasid's position has been preserved in several different sources, not all of which totally agree with each other.  In most of the sources, though, he speaks of either a ban or an oath which was taken by Yosef.

²⁸ This position assumes that the brothers were familiar with later laws of bans which require a quorum of ten to take effect.  For elaboration on the forefather's observance of future commandments see Avot and Mitzvot – Was Avraham the First Jew?.

²⁹ This obviates the problem of Yosef being bound by an oath to which he did not agree. It is not a halakhic necessity that prompts Yosef to keep quiet but a rational desire to survive.

³⁰ According to the Sefer Hasidim and Daat Zekenim, Hashem served as the missing tenth "man".  Cf. earlier Midrashic sources such as TanchumaVayeshev 2About the Tanchuma and Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer38About Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer who assert the same, but do not mention the decree on Yosef.  It is not clear whether the main goal of including Hashem was simply to reach a quorum or to preclude Hashem Himself from revealing the secret to Yaakov.  Pirkei deRabbie Eliezer implies the former while the singular form "שֶׁלֹּא יַגִּיד לַאֲבִיהֶם" in Tanchuma implies the latter. [See, though the Mishpat HaCherem of Ramban which quotes the Tanchuma as "שֶׁלֹּא יגידו לַאֲבִיהֶם".]
Either way, the approach raises the question of why Hashem would agree to join such a ban, and if Hashem can somehow be "forced" by men into (in)action.  [See Tanchuma's formualtion, "וזה 'מקים דבר עבדו' שהקב"ה מקיים גזרת עבדיו".]  Sefer Chasidim suggests that Hashem only agreed because he thought that Yosef deserved a punishment for his haughtiness and assumptions that others would serve him.  Cf. R. Yosef KolonResponsa of R. Yosef Kolon 37 who instead posits that Hashem agreed  as a punishment to Yaakov; Yaakov needed to long for his son so as to atone for the years that he had not honored his own father, Yitzchak.

³¹ In the modern world, it is hard to imagine why Yosef would not simply reject the oath and look after himself but the commentators who take this approach lived in a society which viewed breaking vows as a major offense.

³² In these sources the motif of the ban/oath appears to explain Yosef's silence. Cf. TanchumaVayeshev 2About the Tanchuma and Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer38About Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer where the motif appears, but comes to answer a different question – why did Hashem not reveal anything to Ya'akov.
In their versions, there is no mention of Yosef being included in the ban/oath; it is Hashem who is the extra "man" bound to silence.

³³ It never occurred to them that they might be forced to go to Egypt.

³⁴ See below that it was only because "he could no longer contain himself" that he revealed his identity earlier.

³⁵ R"Y Bekhor Shor similarly explains that Yosef told the brothers to "come near" so that he could speak to them privately and ensure that no one else heard.  He also raises the possibility that Yosef feared that if anyone else heard the brothers would have been embarrassed into denying knowledge of him.

³⁶ According to him, Yosef had believed that he was not allowed to say anything, even just to himself.  As proof of teh change in plan, he points to the fact that the text shares , "וְלֹא יָכֹל יוֹסֵף לְהִתְאַפֵּק".  It was only because he could no longer contain himself that Yosef revealed his identity at this point.

³⁷ For more about this reading of Yehuda's speech, see Yehuda's Oration

³⁸ Cf. Daat Zekenim that the brothers collectively nullified the oath and ban.